Some dates are dreaded for singles. But nothing can match the horror of Valentine's Day. The little red velvet or chocolate hearts are a heartbreaker. And let's not talk about going out to dinner that night ! How to find one's place without feeling singled out between the rows of tables for two with candles ? Officially, Valentine's Day is presented as the festival of love. In reality, it is much more the celebration of the couple, even of the conjugal norm, which stigmatizes those whose private life is different. On Valentine's Day, there are some who are going to the wall. And all this without mentioning the trade ! Valentine's Day is above all a celebration for florists and restaurant owners. But this does not explain everything. Despite considerable marketing efforts, Grandma's Day and Secretaries' Day were a flop. If Valentine's Day has become so big and is still going strong, it is because there are reasons. One above all: male guilt.
Expectations are not unanimous towards the couple. Many women dream of wonders, of continuous attention. Men are not against it, in principle. But in everyday reality, they are first attracted by a simple ideal of comfort, made of happiness of the moment, without risk or tension. The gap is therefore obvious, and men are aware of it. They know that they regularly create a vague dissatisfaction in the other.
Valentine's Day is then presented as a symbolic compensation, a great catch-up. But a mandatory catch-up. Beware of the man who would forget the date ! Now that little hearts are everywhere, the absence of a gift is tantamount to a declaration of dislike. And there are worse things. The usual flower bouquet (the same roses for years) may signal a bland and routine feeling, or even a diminishing love. It is therefore necessary to do better than what one has already done (an unexpected gift aimed at secret aspirations, a statement published in the press, etc.).). Alas ! the poor lover is then engaged in a downward spiral, where he will have to invent more and more each year. Especially since he must not do less than his colleagues, friends, cousins or neighbors.
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Men blessed Valentine's Day in the beginning. A bouquet was enough to erase the guilt accumulated for months. In fact, bouquet after bouquet, they built the collective trap that would soon lock them in. Here they are from now on ritually condemned to the forced labour of love, consisting in being the charming princes of one day.
Some dates are dreaded for singles. But nothing can match the horror of Valentine's Day. The little red velvet or chocolate hearts are a heartbreaker. And let's not talk about going out to dinner that night ! How to find one's place without feeling singled out between the rows of tables for two with candles ? Officially, Valentine's Day is presented as the festival of love. In reality, it is much more the celebration of the couple, even of the conjugal norm, which stigmatizes those whose private life is different. On Valentine's Day, there are some who are going to the wall. And all this without mentioning the trade ! Valentine's Day is above all a celebration for florists and restaurant owners. But this does not explain everything. Despite considerable marketing efforts, Grandma's Day and Secretaries' Day were a flop. If Valentine's Day has become so big and is still going strong, it is because there are reasons. One above all: male guilt.
Expectations are not unanimous towards the couple. Many women dream of wonders, of continuous attention. Men are not against it, in principle. But in everyday reality, they are first attracted by a simple ideal of comfort, made of happiness of the moment, without risk or tension. The gap is therefore obvious, and men are aware of it. They know that they regularly create a vague dissatisfaction in the other.
Valentine's Day is then presented as a symbolic compensation, a great catch-up. But a mandatory catch-up. Beware of the man who would forget the date ! Now that little hearts are everywhere, the absence of a gift is tantamount to a declaration of dislike. And there are worse things. The usual flower bouquet (the same roses for years) may signal a bland and routine feeling, or even a diminishing love. It is therefore necessary to do better than what one has already done (an unexpected gift aimed at secret aspirations, a statement published in the press, etc.).). Alas ! the poor lover is then engaged in a downward spiral, where he will have to invent more and more each year. Especially since he must not do less than his colleagues, friends, cousins or neighbors.
To go further
Test yourself ! How do you like it ?Take this test to find out !
Men blessed Valentine's Day in the beginning. A bouquet was enough to erase the guilt accumulated for months. In fact, bouquet after bouquet, they built the collective trap that would soon lock them in. Here they are from now on ritually condemned to the forced labour of love, consisting in being the charming princes of one day.